Roll of the Dice: Back in Your Arms

“For a long time, if I loved you or if I felt a deep attachment to you, I’d hurt you if I could.”  –Bruce Springsteen,  Western Stars

When Bruce Springsteen played “Back in Your Arms” live for the first time way back on the Reunion Tour, here’s how he introduced it:

“This is a song about blowing a good thing… Everybody’s done that, had some blessing that they didn’t take into account and let it go out the window.”

It’s twenty years later now, and he still introduces it that way almost every time.

But one night in Adelaide on the High Hopes Tour, Bruce went off-script and gave us a little bit more insight into the song’s genesis:

Joe Tex was an astonishingly prolific soul singer whose mix of crooning vocals and impassioned testifying clearly influenced Bruce’s on-stage persona, as he alludes to above.

“Back in Your Arms” is almost certainly an homage to Tex, even if Bruce never quite stuck the landing on his introduction that night. He seemed to have trouble recalling the Tex song he was searching for, until Steve cued him to “Hold On to What You Got.”

But while “Hold On to What You Got” is certainly a thematic ancestor to Bruce’s rapping style (it’s even more of an influence on his 1988 “I’m a Coward” performances), I suspect Bruce might have had a different Joe Tex song in mind when he wrote “Back in Your Arms.”

And of course musically, Bruce was undeniably tipping his hat to Aretha Franklin’s “Without Love.”

Regardless of its original inspiration, though, “Back in Your Arms” is clearly a song that achieves its full power and potency when played live.

The studio version has always left me a bit cold by comparison. In the officially released version from Tracks, I’d argue that Danny’s organ conveys more passion than Bruce’s vocals.

Don’t get me wrong: Bruce’s vocals are great on “Back in Your Arms,” but torch songs demand passion dialed up to eleven, and Bruce is at about a nine here.

I may be biased, however, because for a few years prior to the release of Tracks, the only version of “Back in Your Arms” that we knew was a rehearsal take from the Blood Brothers documentary. Watch it, and compare Bruce’s vocals with the official take. There’s no doubt in my mind that were it not for the absence of Danny’s organ in the mix, this would be a clearly superior version. (It still may be.)

If you’ve watched all of the above clips, then by now at least one thing should be clear: “Back in Your Arms” is a torch song where both the lyrics and music take a back seat to the passion of the performer.

The lyrics themselves paint a picture of  a desolate landscape with a sole inhabitant: a forlorn ex-lover desperate to recapture his lost grace.

In my dream our love was lost, I lived by luck and fate
I carried you inside of me, prayed it wouldn’t be too late
Now I’m standin’ on this empty road where nothin’ moves but the wind
And honey I just wanna be back in your arms
Back in your arms again

What’s fascinating to me about Bruce’s lyrics for “Back in Your Arms” is how much they bend to the will of the performer. Pretend you haven’t heard the song before, and then read the verses above and below. One could easily imagine the narrator as pitiful and needy rather than rueful and tormented.

Once I was your treasure and I saw your face in every star
But these promises we make at night, oh that’s all they are
Unless we fill them with faith and love, they’re empty as the howlin’ wind
And honey I just wanna be back in your arms
Back in your arms again

See what I mean?

There is one key lyrical moment in “Back in Your Arms,” however, and as is the case with many of Bruce’s songs, it comes in the form of the bridge:

You came to me with love and kindness
But all my life I’ve been a prisoner of my own blindness
I met you with indifference and I don’t know why

I’ve seen analysis and conjecture positing that Bruce is singing to the E Street Band here–apologizing in a way for breaking up the band years prior. (“Back in Your Arms” was recorded by the E Street Band during the great diaspora of the 1990s, at a moment when it seemed like Bruce was flirting with reuniting them.)

I’ve also seen arguments that Bruce is addressing his audience–apologizing for backing away from his mega-stardom and retreating into semi-private life. (At the time the song was recorded, Bruce had only the simultaneous Human Touch and Lucky Town album release in almost eight years, and even those were three years in the rear view mirror.)

These arguments seem more wishful than truthful to me, at least from a historical perspective. But both arguments serve to highlight the emotional truth and clarity that rings and resonates from the heart of “Back in Your Arms:” I had a good thing in my life, but I’ve spent my life unappreciative of good things.

Or as Bruce would phrase it in Western Stars almost a quarter-century later, “For a long time, if I loved you or felt a deep attachment to you, I’d hurt you if I could.”

“Back in Your Arms” seems to come from an early place of reckoning for Bruce. Did he have his band in mind when he wrote it? His fans? His family? His friends? My guess–because of course, I do not know Mr. Springsteen–is that based on his literary and cinematic confessions, that bridge applied to everyone significant in his life at one point or another.

Perhaps it’s not a coincidence that Bruce’s performances of “Back in Your Arms” grew in power and potency over the 35 years he’s spent (as he again states in Western Stars) working on letting go of the destructive parts of his character.

The final verse of the song returns to form. Nothing has changed, other than the singer’s self-awareness:

Now I wake from my dream, I wake from my dream to this world
Where all is shadow and darkness and above me a dark sky unfurls
And all the love I’ve thrown away and lost I’m longin’ for again
Now darlin’ I just wanna be back in your arms
Back in your arms again

He’s still alone, and he still wishes he wasn’t.

Twenty-four years later, we know that Bruce is in a much more emotionally secure place, although we know he continually struggles to stay there. “Back in Your Arms” is his cautionary tale to the rest of us to never take our blessings for granted.

Bonus #1: Here’s a rare acoustic version of “Back in Your Arms, performed only seven times on the Devils & Dust Tour. To me, it doesn’t come close to matching the power of a full-band performance, and I consider it more of a novelty than an essential. (But I wish I could have been there for it nonetheless.)

Bonus #2: This is one of my all-time favorite performances at a Springsteen show, because it’s one giant sixteen-minute train wreck. Seriously, watch it and try not to cringe–the band absolutely can not get it together for the entirety of the song, and what makes matters worse is that Bruce is completely unable to lead them without breaking the spell of the song.

So why is it one of my favorites? It’s because of Bruce’s unflinching determination to make it through the song through sheer force of will and passion. At times, it feels as if Bruce is literally pulling the entire weight of the band with his vocals.

For a song about an ex-lover carrying a torch he refuses to put down, I can’t think of a better metaphor.

Back in Your Arms
Recorded: January 12, 1995
Released: Tracks (1998)
First performed: August 4, 1999 (East Rutherford, NJ)
Last performed: February 14, 2017 (Brisbane, Australia)

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